Barstool Philly Smokeshow Of The Day – Allie

Introducing Allie from West Chester. BOOM! Another beautiful blonde bombshell to end the Smoke week. That’s how you finish, folks. Need to reload with Smokes – Send all nominations to Phillytips@barstoolsports.com.
al1

Introducing Allie from West Chester. BOOM! Another beautiful blonde bombshell to end the Smoke week. That’s how you finish, folks.

Need to reload with Smokes – Send all nominations to Phillytips@barstoolsports.com.
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By smitty posted October 30th, 2014 at 5:35 PM

Cowboys Fan Goes Apeshit On Life And Decides To Break Everything In Sight

If you're saving beer bottle caps I'm not too sure you should be destroying the PS-II and 16-in Apex TV.

 

“I DON’T GIVE A FUCK!” That’s evident. It would be tough to care about anything if you’re invested that much into a Cowboys regular season game. Also, if you’re saving beer bottle caps I’m not too sure you should be destroying the PS-II and 16-in Apex TV. Those possessions are worthy of a king for someone who looks like they’re on the Arby’s 401K plan (at least they’re probably offered health insurance).

Guy’s got a sweet Rebel Yell there at 2:18. Probably gets all the lady Rednecks wet for Rodeo/mating season.

By smitty posted October 30th, 2014 at 5:10 PM

This Instagram Account Of Guys Getting Super Hostile When Rejected On Tinder Is Something

Hey guys, R-E-L-A-X.
bf

@byefelipe

 

Hey guys, R-E-L-A-X. Kind of digging your own grave already leading off with “Would you like to chat? :) ”. Might as well follow up with a M/21/Heaven like it’s a 1998 AOL Chatroom.

Never understood the move to go apeshit when told no. Getting anonymously rejected by a stranger should be such a brush off. A standard “Eh, fuck it” and live another day to catch literally millions of other desperate fish in the online dating sea. If these guys ever got shot down in real life at a bar they’d probably go postal on the place. But then again an anonymous stranger is just as fulfilling for some people who live in Hardoville.

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By smitty posted October 30th, 2014 at 4:40 PM

Kind Of Have To Respect The Nashville Predators’ Mascot For Still Mascot-ing While Wheelchair Bound

Gonna miss up to 6-8 weeks because he was training too damn hard to be a mascot, still refuses to leave the ice.

Gnash_Wheelchair

YahooThe Nashville Predators have a player out of the lineup. He’s not going on long-term injured reserve; then again, he doesn’t count against their salary cap anyway…The ‘him’ they refer to is the Predators Day One mascot Gnash. The furry creature – or the guy in the suit – suffered a broken leg during offseason training and has been on the shelf from doing normal mascot duties for 6-8 weeks. While the Predators could have easily put another guy in the suit and most casual fans probably wouldn’t have known the difference, the person who plays “Gnash,” who refuses to identify himself publicly, nixed the idea, and said he wanted to stick around and help game presentation as much as he could.

So the guy who plays “Gnash” has to be the biggest lunatic in the world, right? I mean here’s a guy who broke his leg while mascot training. Gonna miss up to 6-8 weeks because he was training too damn hard to be a mascot. And now here is out, broken foot and all, just flat out refusing to let the Nashville Predators find a replacement mascot for the time being. He comes out and says, “I honestly love my job and watching someone else do it is extremely difficult.” This is a man who wakes up every morning and the first thing on his mind is being a mascot. When he goes to bed at night with his head resting there on his pillow, all he can think about is doing mascot shit. He’s probably taken off that Gnash suit maybe a total of 2 times since he got it and I feel like I’m high balling him. He’s mascot-ing through all different types of adversity and you know what? It’s working. Through 9 games the Preds are 6-1-2. I mean maybe Gnash got a little too cocky as the team’s only loss in regulation so far this season came the day after that tweet you saw above was fired out. But still, the team is playing hard and I think the mascot is playing just as hard if not harder. I respect the hustle. He’s also gotta be a psychopath but I feel like that comes with the territory of being a mascot. He goes out there with clear eyes and a full heart every night and does what he can at his capacity. And people thought MJ was heroic during the flu game. Would loooove to see Michael Jordan try to play basketball with a broken foot. Advantage, Gnash.

By jordie posted October 30th, 2014 at 3:50 PM

The Asians Are Sooooo Close To Creating Bangable Robots

Program this robotic broad to make the world's greatest Turkey Club and we've got ourselves a wife.

 
It’s almost here. Where Simon’s fantasy soon turns into reality. I’d bet hard cash that she ain’t no virgin already with the sickos they have over there in Japan. She needs a few improvements here and there but dammit this emo-Asian ro-broad is close to the perfect woman. Young, cute and silent. Program her to make the world’s greatest Turkey Club and we’ve got ourselves a wife. Still wouldn’t trust her on the roads.

Seriously though, if these things become realistic enough what would be the point of stressing over something real? I’ll take a dozen Nina Agdal’s into the locked basement and call it a life. The end is nigh for the human race.
 
 

By smitty posted October 30th, 2014 at 3:00 PM

Spirit Halloween In Philly Might Want To Do Something About Their Product Placement

This comment section should be civilized.
mon

DM from @MainLineDouche (a must follow Philly Twitter account, especially for anyone who grew up in the Northwest suburbs) – Went to the spirit halloween shop on walnut during my lunchbreak today. Snapped this picture.

Or maybe the mask maker should switch up their template a bit. Just a thought.

This comment section should be civilized.

By smitty posted October 30th, 2014 at 2:15 PM

The Most Googled Costume In Each State Map Doesn’t Bode Well For The Youth Of America

What kind of weird fucking kid wants to be a banana?

google

HP – Some states are making a topical Halloween choice this year, opting for Frozen costumes or dressing as the mythical Slenderman. Others will keep it classic, dressing as doctors or cheerleaders. This map, made by SumoCoupon, a website that offers discounts at various stores, shows which Halloween costumes are the most “trending” in each state. Their team analyzed Google search volumes to determine which costumes were the most Googled in various parts of the country. Americans love to emulate their favorite film characters… and apparently three states have a banana obsession.

I get the Frozen, football players, and Slenderman (WTF am I that old/out of the game?) costumes. All par for the Halloween course. But what kind of weird fucking kid wants to be a banana? And these are 4 separate states in Union, no less. That’s a lot of wildcards in this country that will be registered voters in a decade.

I’ll admit, sadly, I’m not a big Halloween guy anymore. I give the ol’ last minute effort and end up getting fisted with Freddy Krueger claws at Halloween Adventure. Seriously, how is a generic “one size fits many but not your tall, fat ass” costume a child sewed in Indonesia for $0.11 cents cost $60? But it’s my fault because I have no idea what else to do. I threw out on Twitter if anyone had any suggestions and it was either “You’re already a LEGO” or “Just wear your normal clothes and go as a faggot”. Solid advice all around. And making my own costume is out of the question. I’m barely able to make Mac & Cheese without giving myself 3rd degree burns. There’s no way I’m crocheting my own outfit out of $5 of materials from Target. So I understand Googling an idea for a costume and running with the results.

And what’s with Florida whipping out Deadpool? Pretty random superhero for kids to follow. The character must have a Meth Addiction or something. If people in the Sunshine State really want to scare the socks off people they should just go as themselves.

By smitty posted October 30th, 2014 at 1:30 PM

Jason Peters Proctology: Closed On Sundays

An excuse to give one of the best tackles in the game his props.

Closed on Sundays.

A photo posted by Evan Mathis (@evanmathis69) on Oct 10, 2014 at 7:48am PDT

 
Oh Evan Mathis. You so funny. A humorous Instagram post for sure, but I blogged it as an excuse to give one of the best tackles in the game his props.

In 2009, the Eagles traded their 28th pick, a 4th rounder and a 6th rounder (2010 draft) to the Bills for this TE turned Pro-Bowl tackle and gave him an extension. It was sneakily one of the best moves Andy Reid made during his 4000 year tenure with the Birds. Jason Peters has been an absolute FORCE on the line since coming to Philly and has started every game other than the year he tore his Achilles. The big men up front usually don’t get mentioned unless they fuck up, so let’s take a moment to appreciate #71. He’s probably the best player on the Eagles and yet he’s still underrated.

 

 

All this and the man protects his QB to the death. Respect.
 

By smitty posted October 30th, 2014 at 11:50 AM
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