So then you’re like, “But maurice, where exactly is the scandal?” And I’m like, “Are you serious right now, internet stranger? Look at those butts. Look at them kissing. Look at their butts on that yacht while they’re kissing. SCANDAL.”
Everybody knows that hot women only agree to be gay with less-hot women. It’s in the new testament. Two hot women can’t do this — it disrupts the natural order of boners. Now they’ll have me on Pornhub trying to find lesbian scenes featuring chicks that look like this that DON’T EXIST because of the quality and rarity of their asses. Men worldwide wasting countless man hours scouring the internet for big-assed Brazilian lesbo porn. SCANDAL.
Besides, everybody knows hot lesbians only exist in porn and occasionally in porn jail.