geekosystemSupposedly, there was a rumor floating around that somewhere in China, pills made out of dead babies were being sold. A Korean television documentary team decided to track down the truth behind this rumor, and reportedly found a hospital that sells dead babies — mostly abortions or stillbirths, with “mostly” being a scary word here when you think about it — to medicine companies. The team found that when the hospital has a “deceased baby case,” the staff are instructed to immediately alert the medicine company. The television team also reportedly uncovered the process by which the dead baby pills are made. Supposedly, the medicine companies store the dead babies in a “normal family’s refrigerator,” so as to be undiscoverable, and when they are ready to use the dead baby, they put it into a medical drying microwave. Once dry, they grind the dead baby up and put the powder into a pill capsule. Supposedly, the television team paid a lot of money to get some of the pills, and when they tested them, found the pills’ contents were 99.7 percent human, and were also able to discern the babies’ gender from the powder, as well as found hair and nail remnants. The dead babies used are supposedly used with the mother’s consent. The documentary will air August 6 on SBS TV South Korea.

I know this is sick and disgusting but I want to try a few. I’m not saying I have some twisted fantasy of eating old dried-out dead baby, I’m just wondering if they work. They said they’re for stamina, right? I imagine that if hospitals/companies/people are going through the trouble of grinding up dead babies and swallowing their body dust, the end result must be even more spectacular than what they already got on the market. And in an un-regulated paradise like China they probably have ridiculous stuff available. I just gotta see how much better baby pills are than that other stuff. It probably feels like if meth did cocaine. A million times better than 5 Hour Energy. Hell, maybe that’s why their workforce is so powerful, their army is so regimented, and their children are so studious and well-behaved. They eat dead babies.

Christopher Reeve was right.