“And I don’t have herpes, my dick’s just itchin’” – Eminem, “I’m Shady“
This Shady McCoy fiasco has me thinking. Is all of this really worth it for him? Sure, the guy is an ascending top-tier NFL running back who recently signed a contract worth a guaranteed $20+ million. Sure, he has succeeded far past any of his wildest childhood dreams. And sure, he gets the opportunity to say “McCoy” as he’s juking out defenders. However when you think about things in the grand scheme, when everything is said and done and LeSean’s football playing days are all over, unless he is retired as one of the greatest to ever play this whole Dick Doctor/herpes thing is going to stick around. Michael Vick slammed and electrocuted dogs and people still talk about his herpes. It’s like pooping your pants in elementary school: it may blow over, but people never forget.
So I bring this to you, Barstool. Although many of you may very well NOT have herpes and small dicks, let’s say you were forced to broadcast both of these facts in public for everyone to know. Talking Facebook profile, twitter info, text Instagrams saying you got the herps and little junk, everything. True or not, how much would it take to subject yourself to everyone you associate with forever thinking it?
Let’s set the bar at $50,000.
Would you let everyone think you have a “lil dick full of herpes” for $50 grand?
Vote 1 for Can’t Do It and 10 for I’ll Be Captain Herpes For 50 G’s.