Jewel Thieves Steal $50 Million Worth Of Diamonds From Brussels Airport, Internet Commenters Still Know More Than They Do
Here is a life lesson for anyone looking to succeed in anything involving the internet and opinions: you can’t win. Ever. Even if you’re right. In fact, being right is often the first step to being ridiculed on the internet. So for anyone who wants to blog or act or create music just know that everyone on the internet is going to hate it and offer their two cents as to why they hate it…even if they love it.
Take for example last night’s amazing $50 million jewel heist. Makes Danny Ocean’s Bellagio job look like amateur hour with his bullshit unnecessary flipping Asians and comic relief Bernie Mac. Yet even when a team of highly-skilled, highly-focused, and extremely ballsy jewel robbers successfully steal $50 million worth of diamonds from an AIRPORT, somebody still has something to say:
- James Esq., Bonobo City
Really, James Esquire? Getting $50 million in free diamonds was a waste of time? Why didn’t you tell somebody before they went and wasted all their precious 11 minutes!? Now they’re stuck in Europe with $50 million of worthless diamond garbage when they could be hanging out in Bonobo City with you and your increasingly valuable gold and silver stockpiles. What a shame.
Never change, internet.