NYPThe classes are an effort to stem the rising tide of ugly stadium behavior that has included everything from bare-knuckle brawls to lewd Jets fans who screamed obscenities at women until they exposed their breasts in a rude Gate D tradition at the old Giants Stadium. At the new MetLife Stadium, security chief Daniel DeLorenzi says about 25 fans are ejected from every Jet and Giant game — about 500 rowdies a year. In 2010, [Met Life] stadium was the first, along with the New England Patriots’ Gillette Stadium, to employ Novick’s classes. Fans who get the boot must write DeLorenzi a letter of apology and take the four-hour, $75 online course, available at fanconductclass.com. To pass, they have to get at least 70 percent of the questions correct.

As I assume most of you Stoolies are either drunk assholes or drunk-assholes-in-the-making, here’s a link so you can complete your ‘fan conduct’ survey ahead of time. Might as well stay ahead of the game if you’re going to be forced by your ownership to pay even more money to be able to enjoy a game how you like. Some fans enjoy games by cheering politely in their seats, others by shouting obscenities and throwing plastic Miller Lite bottles at adolescents in rival jerseys. To each his own. Only in New York or Boston, your “own” may mean having to sit your drunk ass at a desktop and feign respect for REAL questions like:


1 - Behaving badly towardsother fans, such as fighting, swearing or threatening them, is OK as long as they deserveit.

C’mon guys. That’s downright vaginal. OF COURSE that type of behavior is okay if they deserve it, but now men in pussified cities must submit to their teams’ bullshit bureaucracy if they ever wanna see another live touchdown again. Sad. Is this a football game or little league?  Get a judge in your stadium and handle that shit like real men.

PS – Letter of apology?  Time to learn how to use that sarcasm font.