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joe biden dead

Sad day for karate-loving boozy stuntmen ladykillers everywhere. Sad day for America. Joe Biden — you know, that guy from…you know — died earlier this month after a devastating car/surfing accident. Could’ve happened to any of us and if the world was a fair place it probably would have. Joe Biden was a goddamned national treasure. And by that I mean he helped Nic Cage break into government buildings to uncover invaluable never-before-told secrets about our forefathers.

He will be missed.