AnimalResearchers at UCLA have developed a way to reduce blood alcohol levels in drunk mice, in a study that could forebear a pill that would help you quickly sober up after a night of boozing. Scientists gave the rodents a nanocapsule filled with an enzyme that naturally metabolizes alcohol, and those animals dosed with the enzyme had blood alcohol drop much more rapidly than the control group. Used on humans, the enzyme would “almost be like having millions of liver cell units inside your stomach or in your intestine, helping you to digest alcohol,” Yunfeng Lu a professor on the study.

There are drunks among us who would murder for the ability to pop a pill and get their BAC under the legal percentage. People who would literally take the life away from another human person for the power to flip between drunk and sober like a light switch. If you’re a heavy boozer this is like the alcoholic’s Limitless pill.

Don’t you go getting too excited just yet, Drunky. If there’s one thing cops don’t like to relinquish it’s their hard-earned-but-not-really ticket revenue. If people aren’t paying into the system for DUIs then the police will just think of something else to make illegal while driving. A year after this pill is released cigarette smoking, listening to music, and British-accent GPS navigation voices will all be considered $300 distractions.