If you don’t leave this story absolutely ass-crazy in love with Addy you’re either a square or gay because this chick just won the world. Bitch SHOWED UP to the free weed giveaway / driving test stoned already because…because. Because she’s Addy and hits them corners hard in her Dodge Stratus when she’s high as fuck on complimentary TV news segment Train Wreck.

THIS is why I got into journalism in the first place. Why even after all of my news reporting professors told stories about being on food stamps and making $25,000 a year working for the Local Times News Daily Tribune Inquirer Whateverthefuck I still wanted to get out there and get after it. Because even if the guy doing this story barely lives above the poverty level, he got to spend his day giggling at 56 year-old Jeff getting blunted off his goatee and driving 2 MPH while riding the brake. Hard to put a price tag on that kind of entertainment.