Don’t know why “stripper pole fails” are even a thing. Who are these fraudulent stripper pole-producing companies saving money by using aluminum foil instead of reinforced steel? Everybody knows the sex industry is shady but some poor mother of three is gonna be whipping titties out and serving drinks from a wheelchair if safety measures on these things aren’t double checked. Strippers are a valuable American resource.

PS – Go ahead, Hula Girl. That chick’s fall ain’t got nothing to do with your performance.