Frontcourt —

1, LeBron James, Miami, 1,151,304.
2, Carmelo Anthony, New York, 1,054,099.
3, Kevin Garnett, Boston, 390,751.
4, Chris Bosh, Miami, 362,973.
5, Tyson Chandler, New York, 315,752.
6, Paul Pierce, Boston, 205,096.
7, Joakim Noah, Chicago, 158,743.
8, Josh Smith, Atlanta, 131,508.
9, Anderson Varejao, Cleveland, 116,166.
10, Shane Battier, Miami, 107,190.
11, Amar’e Stoudemire, New York, 104,109.
12, Andrew Bynum, Philadelphia, 93,611.
13, Luol Deng, Chicago, 90,736.
14, Brook Lopez, Brooklyn, 76,695.
15, Jeff Green, Boston, 62,367.

Backcourt —

1, Dwyane Wade, Miami, 765,077.
2, Rajon Rondo, Boston, 675,822.
3, Deron Williams, Brooklyn, 350,618.
4, Kyrie Irving, Cleveland, 308,878.
5, Ray Allen, Miami, 232,441.
6, Monta Ellis, Milwaukee, 84,609.
7, Raymond Felton, New York, 77,123.
8, Jrue Holiday, Philadelphia, 66,514.
9, Jason Terry, Boston, 62,189.
10, Brandon Jennings, Milwaukee, 56,826.

America, you’ve gotta be kidding. Bum knees Andrew Bynum is 5x the player of bum knees Stat and deserves to be in front of at LEAST him and probably healthy Shane Battier. The Knicks couldn’t trade Amar’e for a Metrocard and a 70% off Jeremy Lin jersey right now if they wanted to.  The answer is hurt Bynum every time.

These all-star results are proof that the viewing public are idiots who see the NBA (and sports as a whole) through their own distorted funhouse mirror. Ray Allen is more of an All-Star than Jrue, Felton, and Brandon Jennings? Maybe if this were 1998 and the dude was teaming up with Rick Fox at Tech U, but not in 2013 in actual reality.

Fans are dumb. Everybody’s dumb. Injured Bynum > Injured Stoudemire 10 days a week.