Today’s Poorly-Constructed Analogy For The 2012 Philadelphia Eagles: The Shining
The 2012 Philadelphia Eagles make me feel exactly like Wendy Torrance in The Shining. Sure, my husband (Andy Reid) and I have had some rough times in the past. There was that time he pulled little Danny’s arm too hard when he was drinking and cost us 3 straight NFC championships…but who doesn’t make mistakes, right? I was always confident that while he may not have been perfect that he was still a nice guy who’d become a great writer and we’d win a Super Bowl one day and everything would still work out.
But then came 2012, and for whatever reason he started bugging the fuck out writing books filled with “All work and no play makes Johnny a dull boy” and getting blown up by 25 to the Redskins like the shit is normal. What the hell happened? Where’s the 10-6 lose in the playoffs Eagles family that I used to know? Now my kid’s all concussed and talking to himself about Red Rum and shit. What the hell is up with that look in his eyes? Get away from me with that axe, Andy! Only thing we can do now is to run into the maze of the offseason and hope Big Red freezes to death in the process.
Me at the beginning of the season
“STOP RUNNING PLAY ACTION WHILE DOWN 25 POINTS IN THE 4TH!”
“Oh my God there’s literally nobody left to play offensive line….”
“The Eagles will have paid Nnamdi Asomugha $25 million!?”
“Please fire Andy Reid. PLEASE.”
The progressions of neils blogs to somebody naive enough to think he could get better at writing
Mitt Romney’s Presidential campaign.
Its JACK not Johnny, you wanna be humorous at least get your facts right.
Gigli – just an absolute piece of shit film with a couple big names involved
Similar to the Walking dead. You expect so much before the season starts, then going through you are constantly disappointed. Eagles suck ass.
I know this is Barstool Sports, but you are going way overboard with these sports stories on the Eagles. They suck, we know.
Phillies 2012 – Massive underachievers
Eagles 2012 – Massive underachievers
76ers – Oh I can’t wait for Bynam so we can underachieve
Flyers – NHL lockout is saving you from underachieving.
The sh!thole that is Philadelphia deserves exactly what it is getting. And I couldn’t be happier!
We can all agree that Shelley Duvall was the hotness though right?
Lol. That shit is funny!
DUDE every time i see that “ITS ALL PASS PLAYS” i crack up and i don’t give two fucks about the birds
iratebob, so what does that make every new england team? or if you are a new york fan, what does that make 8 of your nine teams?