SFGateColorado’s new segregated “gun dorms” for students with valid concealed-carry permits have attracted zero students. The Daily Camera newspaper reports that since the University of Colorado’s Boulder and Colorado Springs campuses began segregating dorms for students with valid concealed-carry permits this year, not a single student has asked to live where guns are allowed (http://bit.ly/TlAN0N ). On Aug. 16, CU announced it would establish residential areas for students over age 21 with a permit to hold a concealed handgun. In all other dormitories, guns are banned. Gun rights activists say the lack of students seeking “gun dorms” could be because students who carry concealed weapons don’t want to move. Students with permits who choose to live in an unapproved dorm aren’t allowed to have their weapons in their rooms.

Um — what the hell, University of Colorado? Thought you were cool. You have weed rallies and Smokeshows and rowdy bros and everything else a college student should ask of his University — but not a single person joins the gun dorm? You guys just lost major points.

If Rutgers had a gun dorm I would have been first in line. Of course Jersey is weird with concealed weapons and gun permits and the whole thing probably would have devolved into a bloody shootout over somebody’s girlfriend getting the herps, but I’d still have to be there to see the action first-hand.

Not sure if you guys didn’t get the memo but guns make everything way better. It’s written into our constitution. Just imagine the unstoppable fun of living in a gun dorm. Russian Roulette Beer Pong. Taking shots while simultaneously taking shots. Unloading rounds into the air before, during, and after every party. The whole thing seems magical to me. If I went to Colorado right now I’d be pew-pew-pewing my ass off rocking a glock in my sweatpants Plax style.

Get your shit together, University of Colorado. I understand gun owners feel persecuted by having to be segregated and all, but gun dorms > regular dorms 10 days a week.

UPDATE: After thinking it through, it’s clear the biggest advantage to joining the gun dorm would be the inevitable gang formed by being in the gun dorm. Nobody wants to be segregated, but if the University’s going to implement that policy it only makes sense be on the side with guns. Gun Dorm would eventually roam the campus as a mob, taking anything and anyone it desired. People getting “GUN DORM” spraypainted on them nWo style. It would be the most chaotic shift of power the school could imagine. No RD has the balls to walk up to a gun dorm and act like an authority figure. That $500 fine might get you shot.