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Introducing Liz from West Chester University. Golden Rams making their triumphant return to the Smokeshow reigns with a bombshell. Hopefully there will be more from here and other PSAC schools in the near future. I’m looking at you East Stroudsburg. Know after last weekend there are plenty out there.
Send in the Smokes. Email all Facebook links to Phillytips@barstoolsports.com
(Source) – The 29-year-old beauty is expecting her first child with fiancé Romain Dauriac, multiple sources confirm to E! News. The pregnancy news comes just six months after it was announced that the Oscar-nominated actress is planning to tie the knot with her French journalist beau. E! News confirmed the couple was engaged in September after ScarJo flashed her vintage Art Deco ring on that finger at the Venice Film Festival, with her rep adding that the lovebirds are “very happy.”
The day the beauty died. Arguably one of the most beautiful woman of our generation has a parasite inside of her. Will she still be attractive? Absolutely. Sofia Vergara still brings the extreme heat and she’s a mother on the wrong side of 40. But everyone is different.
Remember this Jessica Simpson?
Yeah, well, the fox that was tis no more. During her second pregnancy she could’ve been a stand in for the star killer in the documentary Blackfish:
Goodnight, sweet princess Scarlett. We will never forget what we shared:
Link to NSFW Pics
Surprisingly slow news day, especially coming off the Oscars/True Detective/Black History Month closing ceremony. With that, instead of posting Instagram videos about fake bank account totals or boring you with “sports news”, allow me to present Lithuanian lingerie model Deimante Guobyte. When in doubt — smut. Haven’t even TRIED to pronounce that name yet. For those of you at work who like ‘em thin and bendy and foreign, it may be time for a late-afternoon trip to the private bathroom.
More pictures after the jump.
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JAPAN – The world’s oldest person, Misao Okawa, says the key to a long life is eating sushi and getting at least eight hours sleep a night. Mrs Okawa, from Osaka in Japan, will turn 116 on Wednesday – she was born in 1898. When she was born, Queen Victoria was on the throne and the Spanish American War was raging, The Telegraph reports. She told the paper: ‘Eat and sleep and you will live a long time. You have to learn to relax.’ Mrs Okawa, whose husband, Yukio Okawa, died in June 1931 – 83 years ago, has been the world’s oldest person since the death of 116-year-old Jireomon Kimura in June 2013.
When will bitches learn the duckface is not a good look? Regardless, this is quite possibly the ugliest human being these eyes have ever witnessed. It’s good she’s eating healthy and getting her “beauty” sleep, but she should lay off the bitter beer for the sake of humanity. Old broad looks like an elderly, Asian Steve Buschemi that’s overdosed on Brain and Nerve tonic. Little Boy and Fat Man did some serious damage on this one. Those fish lips were made in Hiroshima and perfected in Nagasaki.
Legitimate question: Is it even worth it to live past 75? Yeah you get to watch your kids and grand kids grow old and see civilization continue to climb to new heights and blah blah blah. I’m not sure I want to live past the point to where one’s most prized possession loses all it’s will without encouragement from a pill. But then again, acceptably shitting yourself with confidence and having your racism dismissed for being either old fashioned or dementia are definite positives. Losing senility would be one hell of a fun ride.
So this is it. Great episode setting up for what is almost guaranteed to be an epic season finale. However I wasn’t too pleased the show cut off at 9:52. HBO should quit cockteasing for next week and used those 8 minutes of production value for something. Anything. The very least do a continuous highlight loop of all the nude scenes sans Rust’s pale ass while beating cheeks and call it a day. Put more Jameson bottles in the background and clean house with ad revenue.
A lot of things came to light but there’s still a lot of questions left to be answered. We now know for sure Rev Billy Lee Tuttle was one sick pup and deserved to die. The “Spaghetti Monster” is the the Lawnmower Man who pretends to have too many chromosomes. Reasons to why Rust missed his scars the first time in ’95 are uncertain, but it did look like the man had a stronger beard. He also didn’t turn to fully reveal his entire face until after Rust started walking away. Still don’t know who exactly The Yellow King is other than it’s obviously someone of higher power. Marty is obviously not in tune with his family. Hasn’t seen his ex in 2 years and doesn’t talk to his kids. Is Maggie re-mmaried? Probably, judging by a couple framed pics. Can that booty still shake? Good Lord willing.
Plus the boys should take the Walter White advice and Tread Lightly. You can’t not trust the dementia of the religious, old black Louisiana lady:
Honestly, I couldn’t tell you how it’s going to go down next week. Seems like there’s a lot to wrap up in just an hour. My prediction would be Rust meets his demise someway, somehow. Circular timeline starts all over again at the top. One thing’s for damn sure, if I don’t have a 6 pack of Lone Star beer for next week’s finale, shit is literally going to hit the fan.
RELEVANT: Rust Cohle would’ve smacked the shit out of Matthew McConohey last night for his acceptance speech. Fist off you want to thank God? That man at the Oscars, according to Rust, is an asshole. Real life Matty is racing to a red light.
“Is this a drug dealers dream? #mastermind #1dayandawakeup” Meek Mill has $92 million in his checking account and has no problem letting everybody in the world know this. Of course it’s right in line with the description of his IG: “I post a lot 2 motivate the people that never seen the other side of life beyond the hood….. Don’t let em put ya mind in a box… Or ya body!”. But damn, Meek. What you call motivation I call depressing disparity between the balances of Guy Who Went To College and Guy Who Went To Jail. Hell whenever my bank phone system says my checking account total, it usually comes with a robotic snicker. Maybe spare us the extreme details, eh? I can deal with a shiny watch and fancy cars. Hearing you have $92 million in checking makes me seriously regret not selling drugs.
[update: so looks like I'm the idiot.
Maybe I should listen to more Rick Ross? Regardless -- no reason to have that much liquid money.]
DM – Bill Clinton’s controversial couplings has reached a new level after he was pictured spending time with prostitutes at a recent charity event. The former President was in Los Angeles on Thursday and photographed with two female attendees who work as legal prostitutes in Nevada. Identified as Ava Adora and Barbie Girl by TMZ, both of the women are known to work at the Bunny Ranch brothel near Carson City. Clinton, who infamously faced impeachment after having an affair with intern Monica Lewinsky while he was still in the White House, is seen grinning ear to ear while posing with the two women. They attended the event with Bunny Ranch owner Dennis Hof and porn star Ron Jeremy. The Bunny Ranch was first opened in 1955 and is legally licensed in the state. The brothel owner also runs the Loce Ranch which is located just a mile away from the original Bunny Ranch.
Slick Willy’s gonna do what Slick Willy’s gonna do. You don’t invite one of the planet’s greatest cocksmen to your charity event, allow him to prowl freely among the crowd, and not expect him to find the two whores. It’s like a bloodhound on the hunt. Like a kid pointing out where Waldo is in a book he already solved. Either the hookers were gonna find Bill or Bill was gonna find the hookers…this ending was unavoidable.
Not saying they’re the hottest prostitutes the world has ever known, but you try catching a dual BJ in the men’s room of a charity function that just paid you $100K for a 40-minute speech and try not looking like you’re on cloud nine. AND wifey might become President soon? Bill still living the dream.
PS – Couldn’t post until now. Kept off Superpage since KFC posted his first.
NHL – The home-and-home series between the Washington Capitals and Philadelphia Flyers that began on Sunday afternoon at Verizon Center provided each team with an appropriate taste of what a potential Stanley Cup Playoff matchup could feel like.
At this point you can’t be surprised when the Flyers win games that they’re trailing going into the third. This team has made a name for itself by erasing its sloppy first two period’s of play with exciting third period comebacks. Last night’s game was no different. Just when it looked like the game was over Dmitry Orlov smoked Brayden Schenn from behind. Which if you ask me should warrant at least a two game suspension, although Orlov has never been suspended before so he has that going for him. Gotta love how Orlov immediately hid behind is players after the hit. This is the reason fighting needs to stay in the game — it makes players be held accountable for their actions. Sure they didn’t get him physically last night but eventually he will have to answer the bell.
The hit was all the Flyers needed though to get them going. Voracek was able to put one past Holtby on the powerplay and Giroux had a nifty tip in to tie the game with the extra attacker. Old man Lecavalier put a seeing eye shot past Holtby in OT for the winner and notched his 900th career point.
Gotta love how the Flyers have been coming back in the third all season but they can’t depend on that if they want to make a deep run into the playoffs. Sure it works now and maybe even in the early rounds of the playoffs but they need to start playing the early periods as well as they do when they’re down in the third. Playing a full sixty minute game is what wins in the playoffs. It doesn’t take a hockey expert to know that eventually bad starts will cost them.
PS- Here’s the hit on Schenn. You be the judge.