USACancel those orders for XXL fatigues. To trim its budget, the U.S. Army is shedding weight by kicking out overweight soldiers and refusing to admit hefty recruits. More would-be troops are being turned away for obesity than for any other reason, and the number of active-duty military personnel classified as overweight or obese has more than tripled since 1998. “A healthy and fit force is essential to national security,” a Pentagon spokeswoman told the Washington Post, which notes that the number of soldiers booted for bigness in times of peace is historically higher than during war, when standards such as waistlines are lax. Retired Lt. Gen. Mark Hertling said he was floored by what he found in 2009 when he was assigned to overhaul the Army’s training system. Seventy-five percent of civilians who wanted to join the force were ineligible, he said. Obesity was the leading cause. “Of the 25 percent that could join, what we found was 65 percent could not pass the [physical training] test on the first day,” he said in a recent speech. “Young people joining our service could not run, jump, tumble or roll — the kind of things you would expect soldiers to do if you’re in combat.”.

Fatties. Is there anything useful they can do besides attract diabeetus and look funny while attempting to sit up? If only they were defending hot dog weenies and Crisco instead of freedom then maybe this wouldn’t be a problem. But props to the Army for finally drawing a line in the sand. Fat people need to stop thinking they’re an actual minority that needs special treatment and have equal rights. It’s already gone too far. Plus sized fashion shows becoming the norm, fat chicks not wanting to be called fat chicks on receipts in restaurants, and that unfunny fat fuck of a show Mike and Molly who are America’s jizz puppets just because they’re obese and relatable to the average slob. All bullshit. But the Army calls a spade a spade and says if you’re too fat to do stuff required, like run and jump (pretty sure they can still tumble and roll), you can’t be with us. If you can’t see your dick, you can’t be in the Army. Simple as that.